I CAME HERE TO CONFESS THE TRUTH
But got distracted by an unfinished story in my draft.
Now, that the intensity of my rant has subsided because I had to finish that story, maybe I can make sense out of this life…or maybe not!
THE TRUTH: From the perspective of a non-conformist conformist
First, I believe there is a truth for everyone. My truth, your truth, collective truth, acknowledged truth, unknown truth and unfathomable truth.
What is THE TRUTH about life?
- Science says there is a theory to life yea? And this theory can be determined and explained with the laws of physics. Newton, Faraday, Avogadro (I almost wrote Avocado lmao) etc, had the perception of some theories of reality and were able to define some of them clearly with laws of physics. The first thing that got me watching The Big Bang Theory TV series was its opening scene, and I stayed because I was curious about String Theory. I am not sure they figured String theory out at the end, can't remember the science much cause I was crying over ShAmy’s cuteness… anyways, it's fiction, but I expected much more from their science. )
- Religion (or a way of life or a personal ideology of spirituality) clearly believes that spirituality explains the truth of life. This is acknowledged in various religious books (Bible, Quran, etc.) and wants us to accept its written texts as the inerrant and ultimate guide to the truth.
- Non-believer of the popular religions (e.g. agnostic, atheist, freethinker, aliens, and people who don't give a sh*t about following what society says) believe all sorts/none.
- Me! I! Moi! Emi! and the many personalities I attribute to, believe in one single truth
And here is my truth
- I really don’t like existence much. I believe I was born because 2 people who had the capacity to reproduce exchanged the ingredients of procreation and here I am! Can’t even remember if I gave consent to be born. Can’t remember where I came from nor do I know where I am going. So I don’t care much for what every religion/science says about how life came to be. Just let me be, till I am no more.
- Life is unfair and the huge disparity between individual realities is too overwhelming to fit the truth of life into one box or formula. So I came to the conclusion that everyone has different capacities to understanding and comprehension. We all have different fabrics of the mind that vary in strength, health, and shape. I believe we judge others based on the capacity of our brain fabric. That is why our beliefs become convictions and we live by them. While the next person lives by theirs. I mean look at all the religions in the world, every believer holds their belief sacred and ultimate. I can bet you each person has a conviction that theirs is superior. And most times we look down on others convictions. SMH
- I don’t believe a god created us nor do I believe we came from a big bang that produced us. The unending cycle of who created who can be explored on both ends.
a) If human existence is a creation that points at a creator (God), then who created God? Because God’s existence should also point that he (or she) was created. but by who?
b) If we are a creation because some stuff colluded in space? Who created the space and the things inside that banged? Or did they come out of thin air? If they did? where did the thin air come from? Round and round we go in circles (insert Luther Vandross Going in Circles)
- We are not alone on earth. Lol! Scratch that, we are not the highest or most significant form of intelligence on earth. I mean we have this arrogance of superiority, above other mammals and everything that occupies this space with us. But I believe we are not superior beings. There are beings and creatures that can access time, space and dimensions beyond our grasp.
- Again, life is Unfair. So unfair, such that our capacity to develop in understanding is already biased from the start. We are born to certain conditions that tailor our belief system. And this in itself takes away the ‘free will’ or the ability to choose our paths. So I do not believe there is an out-of-earth measure of morals or a God that is just somewhere sitting or standing or floating around watching this ball of chaos. Neither do I judge people (not always tho) when they believe in something I find unintelligent. Therefore, I want humans to create a system that is totally able to capture the dynamics of everyone and cater to justice. I don’t want to wait for an evil person to rot in hell. That punishment is out of my consciousness. I want them to suffer on earth! (please don't get me started on the fact that our views are subjective and evil to me may not be evil to you)
Reason for this rant! Phew!
I met someone who believes it is his purpose on earth to save mankind by teaching them ‘The truth’. It’s his burden. A cross he has to carry. Like a messiah of sort. And he blames people for the misfortune that they experience. He believes through willpower we can achieve anything. Therefore, nothing happens to you without you agreeing to it — be it sickness, accident, or all forms of ills. He doesn't accept that this truth is his own perception of life and it belongs to him. He wants to preach his gospel to the world and teach the world how to live longer without sickness or death. Should I continue on how he doesn't believe in the idea that there are ‘viruses’ — it's just a concept to deceive humanity. It's all a big conspiracy and lies from the people in charge of power! PHEW! abbl. His views are ridiculous to me.
I told him this
If he shares his truth and gets a huge acceptance of that truth. It becomes a collective truth, if he can prove it with theories that are tangible and make it work, it becomes an acknowledged truth, and if that truth doesn't get to the whole world, it is an unknown truth to some people.
But hey! that's my OWN view. I don't want to write truth anymore (facepalm)
I have written the word truth, 25 times already, my eyes are beginning to turn. Lol. I promise I won't write it again after this saying. I promise!
THIS IS MY CONFESSION:
We that seek for it may never find it. They that accept the popular paths may have the peace we seek before we do. Bliss can sometimes be found in conformity.
Sometimes I wish I can go back to that bliss? But the fabric of my mind has stretched beyond amen.
If my friend sees this post. I hope he knows I am not mocking his belief. I see his views as a reflection of the fabric of his mind. Which I believe he didn’t choose. lol. Let me leave this space.
It’s a beautiful Saturday to Netflix
Footnote (or whatever I am supposed to use to acknowledge the non-english word I used) So yea, footnote:
1. Emi — a Yoruba word that means I i.e. Me. In a funny twist, it is also a homophone word that can also mean soul/spirit. How cool is that?
#diaryofanunusualhuman #diaryofanunusualgirl #diaryofanoddity #Diaryofazanygirl